Parenting a Teen

Being the parent of a teenager is one of the most difficult things a parent will probably ever go through but with the right tools and techniques you can help your teen work out the problems in their life, make progress towards goals and things that matter to them, and build character towards becoming a better person.

One of the first things a parent should remember when dealing with their teenager is not to yell and get angry as a way of communicating what they want with them. Yes you may be very upset over what your teenager has done but yelling and shouting will only cause them to lose their respect for you and to “shut down” whenever you start to talk with them. If you yell and scream at them they’re much less likely to hear anything that you’re saying than if you were to simply discuss the issue calmly and rationally in an adult-like manner.

It’s also important that when you discuss things with your teen and you set certain boundaries or consequences that you follow through on the things you say. If you make certain things rules then you need to be sure that you follow through on them with punishments if they’re broken. These punishments however should fit the rule that was broken and not be too light or too heavy otherwise your teen will only rebel even more. If the punishment doesn't have any effect on your teen they also wont be any good. Make sure that your consequences suit the actions that have been taken and that the privileges that are revoked are ones that have an effect on your teen - if they don’t your teen wont care and the bad behavior will simply continue.

Be aware that when teens decide to make waves by acting out or being defiant what they’re really trying to do is get your attention and eventually your support. By acting out and causing problems whether its at school or at home they are making an effort to get the attentions of others around them the best way that they know how. When teenagers do this they often get angry and will shy away or withdraw from friends and family but now is not the time to let them do that. If your teenager misbehaves you need to reprimand them and apply an appropriate punishment but you also need to talk with them and see if you can find the source of the problem.

It’s also helpful to enroll your teen in some extra-curricular activities as these can often end up being a source of strength, self confidence, and new friends and situations that can help them improve their lives. Don’t force your teen to do things they aren’t interested them but encourage them strongly. After a while they’ll open up and find something they like to do which can change their behavior quite a bit and help you relate with them as well.

These are just a few tips to help you navigate the murky waters that parenting a teenager can often be.